Monthly Archives: June 2014

2014-Week 25!

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Hello everyone! Well, it’s pretty much halfway through the year (whoa!)…how quickly has this year gone?! Anyway, here’s this week’s update:

-Firstly, I’m back on track with my Curves Complete program! After having almost 2 weeks off (thanks respiratory infection and crazy diabetes levels), I still managed to lose half a kilo in this time! So, I’m starting to approach the 10 kilo weight loss mark (give me a month or so though to reach it though!) In all honesty though, it’s not about the weight I’m losing: it’s about being a healthier person. My diabetes levels are SO much better when I’m exercising regularly, and I too feel healthier, more alert and energised. So, the weight loss is an added bonus to all of those things. I’m so glad I’ve been able to add exercise back into my life so easily, and love seeing these gradual (but permanent) changes to my body and health 🙂

-I’ve also really been thinking about working on my confidence over the past week. In all honesty, I think at present, this is the most confident I’ve ever been about myself. Though, I do have a long way to go still until I’m completely accepting of myself all of the time. So, I’ve started reading a few books related to becoming more body confident and style confident as a plus-sized person, particularly by “fat activists” (as I feel these books speak more to me than any written by slim athletes and the like). Over the week in passing, I’ve read Hot and Heavy: Fierce Fat Girls on Life, Love and Fashion by Virgie Tovar (highly recommend) and have started reading Beautiful You by Rosie Molinary (also highly recommend). The Beautiful You book is a 365 day journal-based book in becoming confident, and as much I’m doing journal entries each day to go with the daily reading for this book. I’ve read a couple of other amazing books too which has inspired me.

-Also (warning in advance: the following update in this paragraph was hard for me to put into words. Apologies if it sounds harsh or judgemental or anything. I’m just trying to be HONEST with myself on this one). I’m slowly realising that while I am plus-sized and overweight (according to BMI and standards), I’m not actually that “fat” or unhealthy. Where I work, for example, is a bit strange in terms of the size of people, as the majority of people are healthy or quite thin. So I feel that sometimes I can stick out like a sore thumb occasionally because of this (though, my quirky dress sense doesn’t help this, haha). However, it doesn’t make me an “elephant in the room” or equivalent. I think as well that because I focus so much on the areas of me I think are massive compared to other people (particularly my stomach), I don’t have a realistic view of the rest of my body and how the proportions are actually above-average, rather than anything morbidly obese. I’m not trying to compare myself to others, but it’s making me realise yet again that my focus is really about being confident with myself (rather than focusing on losing weight at the gym, for example, I want to focus on making myself as healthy as possible for good diabetes control and to keep my body young). So, I’m going to work on focusing on the positive features I find with my body, and hopefully dressing more to compliment these.

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-I’ve really been struggling with my diabetes (and how it makes me look at work) this week. I keep having low blood sugar levels, which ultimately knocks me out from being useful until I’m able to fix them. I struggle with feeling that my diabetes makes me look less professional. Yes, before you get started on how it shouldn’t (discrimination etc), I know that it doesn’t actually. However, I do take things personally, and I tend to beat myself up when I have a hypo at work and physically have to stop working and take it easy. I know I can’t help it (and that others understand), but I feel like I’m letting the office down when I have to stop for health reasons. It frustrates me how much my diabetes can sometimes control my ability to do things.

-I have to disclose a new obsession of mine: Boost Juice. Originally (back in the day when I was a student), I used to think that it was a complete rip-off in getting juice from a company. However, when I was feeling quite under-the-weather over the past few weeks, I discovered the Immunity Boost Juice and have gotten hooked. I always worry I’m not getting enough fruit and veg, and considering everything is fresh and made on the spot (and they can guarantee gluten-free with my favourite drinks, woo!), I’ve gotten hooked. I need to make this a treat though, as I know that juice can be quite bad for you too (you lose the fibre and nutrients from not actually eating the pieces of fruit itself, plus there’s a lot of sugar in there). However, it’s good to find a healthier treat on campus (their chocolate protein smoothie is to die for).

-Over the past week, I’ve gotten over my respiratory infection and crazy diabetes levels. However, in return I’ve been feeling nauseous all week. One day, I was absolutely certain I had food poisoning as it was that bad. Before you think anything, no, I am not pregnant. I think now (on the other side of the weekend), I’m thinking it was just a bit of food poisoning, combined with not having enough veggies/healthy food choices over the past week. I’m hoping I won’t be ill for a while now, as I’ve had my fair share of illness over the past year so far (touch wood I don’t get tonsillitis!)

-I’ve also reflected on my clothing over the past week. Anyone that’s very close to me will know that I have way too much clothing: even after moving, I still have clothing at my parents’ house! There’s so many items of clothing which I don’t know will still fit me, or whether they look good on me, so I’ve been a bit of a hoarder with my wardrobe. In line with my body confidence self-campaign and doing a daily journal, I want to also make my wardrobe better: a more honest portrayal of myself and my style (rather than a selection of things I love, things I hang on to as they fit and can be for crappy days, and things I’m unsure of whether they fit me/look good on me). So, over the next few weeks, I’m aiming to clear out my wardrobe. The goal is to get rid of one third, or even half of my wardrobe items, which will most likely be donated to charity out of good karma hopes. I will then have a clean slate, having only held onto items that make me feel confident, express my style and fit me well. I’ll then be able to op-shop or buy new items, however want to try and follow this manta when I do: whenever an item is purchased, one item in my wardrobe has to be thrown away/donated etc. I’m hoping this will keep me in line from making frivolous purchases, and only choosing items which truly reflect my style and make me feel confident and happy when wearing them.

-Man, oh man. After the past two weeks I am yearning for it to be our honeymoon. It’s a while away still (end of September), yet I am so ready to have our overseas adventure. I had a moment last week where I worried about gluten-free options on our cruise. However, the cruise company was quick to confirm via email that they have gluten-free options as standards on their menus, completely being able to cater for coeliacs. If we decide to go to one of the restaurants on the cruise, they can also accommodate. They’re also going to ensure our room has a fridge (so I can store my insulin), as well as a sharps container for my insulin pump supplies! So, I’m feeling more relieved and very excited about our cruise. Once we get our tax returns, we’re going to be purchasing all of our day trips, as well as our flights. It’s all becoming very real, and I simply cannot wait to have a break overseas, as well as an amazing adventure with my husband.

That’s about it for the week in passing. I didn’t realise how health and body-centred it would be, sorry, haha! Thanks for reading and following my progress 🙂

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2014-Week 24

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Hello! So, after a pretty shocking previous week, I wanted to focus on relaxing and being more positive through the week in passing. So, here’s this week’s update:

-So, it turns out I did stress myself sick, enough to have a severe respiratory infection. The fact that I kept pushing myself to keep working and didn’t rest early on meant it’s taken me a long time to recover. Even still, I am struggling to fully recover. So, Ray and I made a conscious effort to completely relax and refresh ourselves over the weekend. Our focus was on resting up and focusing on not worrying or stressing about anything. It’s hard for me not to stress, as I feel stress shows how much I care about my work etc. But for most of the week/weekend, we made a huge effort to relax and rest each day, and for the entire weekend. I believe this has truly helped me start recovering.

-On the same note, we had quite a big scare over the end of last week. Ray became quite unwell with a severe chest infection, fever and was shivering due to having chills. Over Friday night, his temperature struggled to go below 39 degrees, and we were almost ready to take him to hospital as it got closer to 40 degrees. He was struggling to walk due to shaking so much, and he was feeling so weak and out of energy. We decided to call up the Radio Doctor to visit us at home, but they missed out on seeing us before the end of their shift. Luckily though, Ray’s temperature started to go down, and we were able to rest up for the remainder of the night. However, I haven’t been so scared in my whole life: I was so worried and concerned about him, particularly when I couldn’t do more to help get his temperature down quickly. It really tugged at my heart and made me realise how much I care about the health and wellbeing of those I love. So, we had a very quiet weekend to try and rest and recover from our illnesses.

-Due to the above, I’ve still had to take a break from the gym. Having a respiratory infection meant that any of my normal exercise would make it worse. As of today, though, I feel well enough to re-commit myself back into my gym regime. I feel horrible for having the time off, but I really needed to give myself time to rest and fully recover before getting back into the full swing of my gym/food plans.

-Speaking of food plans, Ray and I have started our own “Bento Project”, as mentioned a couple of weeks ago. We’ve started to work on this, researching on supplies from this website: http://www.allthingsforsale.com/, while we also stocked up on supplies from our local Asian Supermarket. So, hopefully we can start making bento lunches over the next two weeks! Over the weekend, I made us tuna and mayo onigiri, sesame beef, carrot-infused rice and edamame beans (all recipes from the website) as practice. The onigiri was a bit difficult, as I didn’t have the best kitchen tools to make these. Plus, the rice was freaking hot, and hard to handle (even when I used a method to mold the rice using a snap-lock plastic bag). In the end, I ended up making huge onigiri (so much rice!), and not enough filling. To combat this problem in the future, we’re investing in some onigiri molds to make it much easier. I also need to figure out how to store the onigiri better, as after being left in the fridge, the rice became tough and hard, therefore barely edible the next day. The sesame beef was incredible; the flavourings from the combined Mirin, soy sauce and sesame oil was amaaaaazing and so simple to make! We only got to marinade the meat in the sauces for an hour, so next time we’re hoping to leave it overnight to really have the flavours infused. The carrot-infused rice was awesome too, as it made eating rice as a side so much easier: the orange coloured rice made the meal colourful and fun, while the onion in the rice gave the meal a slightly-sweet, caramelised flavour which really complimented the beef. Lastly, the edamame beans-all I really did was steam them in boiling water…and they always taste good, regardless! 🙂 I’m pretty excited about starting to cook our own bento lunches, as I feel it will give me much more confidence in cooking. Also, I’m aiming to start cooking many more Japanese foods, so I can finally have some of the many meals I loved, but was unable to continue eating because of my Coeliac disease. I can’t wait to make gluten-free versions of these meals (which I will give updates of on here, and pictures via my Instagram). 🙂

-Can I also just say-I love being married. It’s so hard to explain how it feels (and how it’s different from when we weren’t married), but there’s this warm, fuzzy feeling knowing that I am officially sharing my life with this amazing man, and that we’re a family now. My husband is incredible, and I do love him more every day. He strives to make me laugh so much every day that I snort (so he knows I’m laughing every day and he’s making me happy). He gives me a big hug every day once we get home from work to make sure I can get rid of any work-related stress. He has strived to help me become a healthier person, as well as helping me get on track with my diabetes. He also has continually encouraged me and helped me build up confidence in myself. The way that he continually goes out of his way to see me happy is so amazing, though I really suck at putting it into words. In summary, I love having a husband, and I love being married.

-I have started watching some of my absolute favourite Japanese dramas, starting with Hana Yori Dango (Boys Over Flowers). This show is almost 10 years old (whaaaa!?), but an old favourite of mine. I forgot how short each season was (I have almost gotten through all two seasons and the movie in one weekend), however the show is so easy to watch and become connected to the characters. It’s making me so nostalgic about all the shows I used to watch, and Ray is also very eager to learn about them. So, I’m going to introduce him to these shows (starting with Gokusen and Rookies, maybe followed by Hana Kimi if he’s still interested after the first two, haha).

And that’s about it for the week in passing, which was a LOT better than the previous week. Thanks for reading 🙂

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2014- Week 23 (sorry for a VERY late post)

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Apologies for the (5 day) late post reflecting last week. I’ve been ridiculously sick (thanks to stress), and had to take a break from everything to recover (including updating my blog).

Well, for those who have been reading my blog posts for a while, you’d know that I’m trying to lead as positive a life as I can. However, I’ve had a week filled with terrible things, so my update is pretty negative. But hey, at least I can reflect and realise it was a bad week, and that things will be better for the next couple of weeks (hopefully). Warning in advance: this update is pretty open and honest, as I’ve had one of the most stressful weeks of my life last week. Here’s the update:

-I’ve had what I’d classify as the most stressful week of work in my life over the past week. I can’t disclose much on here, but I’ll write what I can to explain. In a sense, I’ve been keeping part of our office running over the past couple of weeks, while we’ve had supervising staff away. Also, having no supervising staff meant that we had to attempt to sort out any emergencies (and it’s common that, of course, it’s while everyone is away that we’ve had emergencies…and we had several big ones occur). All of this has meant I’ve been the only contact for staff, students and anyone for our outbound program for most of the past couple of weeks. I’ve had several stress-related mini- breakdowns and cried nearly every day when I get home from work for the past week as a result of all the above. I’ve had a lot of pressure on me, and have felt that I had to undertake this workload, otherwise our work will fall to pieces (and I value our work so much). I believe I stress so much because I care *so* much about the work I do and am involved in, and the week is passing was a big challenge for me. I enjoyed being challenged and seeing how I coped with the pressure, but the majority of the time I felt helpless, useless and things happening were out of my hands. I’m really, really needing a day off before I feel like I’m incapable of doing or handling anything.

-On top of all this, I’ve been unwell for about 2 weeks now. I feel stress is partially to blame in me becoming so sick, and I’ve felt that I haven’t been able to have a sick day because there would be no one else to go into the office. Some of you will also know that I had a pretty big scare over the weekend with my diabetes blood sugar levels. On Saturday, I woke with levels of 25.5mm0l, and struggled to get any blood sugar levels below 20mmol until bedtime. After changing my insulin, changing my insulin pump site, testing my insulin pump, drinking huge amounts of water, monitoring my food intake and testing my ketones, I could not figure out why my levels had spiked so much. After visiting the doctors, they were able to figure it out: I’ve got a bad respiratory infection, which explains why my levels have been so ridiculously high. I’ve been on antibiotics for a couple of days now, and my levels have improved (thank goodness).

-With the above, it means I also haven’t been to the gym much last week (in fact, I only got to go in once). So I am really disappointed. Due to being sick and stressed, I’ve also eaten a lot of crap food, and gotten back onto Coke Zero and Pepsi Max. I feel dreadful, and that I’ve really screwed up my progress. I’m going to disappoint my gym coaches big time when I weigh-in this week. Just with all of the above, I’ve sort of had to put things on hold to take care of myself. I’m hoping I can re-start my great progress at the gym later this week, once I’ve recovered from my illness.

-As a result of all that happened above, I had a bit of a break from everything on the long weekend. I spent most of the weekend in bed, trying to rest and not think about any of the above. I was physically and emotionally exhausted. Over this time, I realised that I had a very tough week, and that this week’s post would be pretty brutally honest about it.

So, as you can see, this week in passing has been a bit of a crazy blur for me. I’m hoping I can start to relax this week, and things will settle down so I can get into a more positive mind-frame again. Thanks so much to those who have noticed that I’ve had a hard time this week, and have asked me if I’m ok etc. I really appreciate it!

See you next week for a (hopefully) more positive review of the week! 🙂

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2014-Week 22!

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Another week has passed, so it’s time for another update! Here’s the past week’s update (which is a relatively small update, as nothing much has happened):

-I’m officially back into my Curves Complete regime, including a full week back on the meal plan. I’m finding it still quite difficult to get back into the strict nature of the meal plan, however “tweaking” the recipes has been a helpful start. For example, we “tweaked” the Cozy Comfort Chilli recipe into a “Nacho Soup” concoction: we added corn, and made it into a portable chunky soup to dip corn chips into (makes it a LOT easier for using as leftovers!) I’m also easing back into my walking, with around 7500-8000 a day, so I’m getting back up to 10000 gradually with my ankle not being too painful. This is the first week where I’ve been able to do 4 workouts a week, and I seem to have managed. I’m hoping I’ll see some results when I have my weekly weigh-in this afternoon.

-As of last week/the weekend, I’ve started using Instagram. I’ve always been a fan of documenting life through photos (including things like the “Photo a Day” initiatives), so I’ve taken the plunge and am attempting to be not too hipster at the same time (haha). If you’d like to follow me on there, you can look me up via Facebook, or by my name (with my married last name). 🙂

-I’m also quickly learning that I have to look out for myself career-wise, and that it’s really a dog-eat-dog world. I have to look out for my best interests and myself, as no one else usually will. I think it’s hard to have that reality check, but it’s needed for me to be able to progress further. All throughout my education, I was told of opportunities and filled with a hope that you can achieve your dreams by things just being handed to you (in a sense). But in reality, hard work, iron will and emotions of steel are what get you places. In some circumstances it has been a slap in the face in realising this, but a well-needed one if I’m to progress in the career areas I have in mind. It may be unfortunate that I’m so jaded at a young age in realising that the world of careers and opportunities isn’t as amazing as I thought it to be.

-On the same note, I’ve been yearning for further study to be more qualified in the areas I’m passionate about (regardless of where it will take me career-wise). So, I’m biting the bullet and going after this before government makes it too expensive, and I get too old (hoping to have qualifications done an dusted before Ray and I start thinking about buying a house, or having kids etc). So, over the next two months I’ll be commencing a Master of Asian Studies by distance, as well as a Diploma of Modern Languages (Mandarin) by distance. The aim is to complete these courses (which I’m totally passionate about doing), and then progress into a Master of International Relations (which I originally started, as I realised this is the best qualification for future careers), where I’ll receive Advanced Standing from the Master of Asian Studies and will only have core subjects to do. I’ll possibly consider also doing some brush-up subjects for my Japanese language skills in the latter Masters too. I’m excited to start studying again: I really feel the value in having qualifications for things I’m passionate about. So, if all goes to plan, I’ll have the following after my name: MINTR, MAsian Studies, BCM Distinction (Journalism), B Arts (Japanese), Dip Modern Languages (Mandarin). Before you ask, I’m not going to become an academic and do research: coursework only for me!

That’s really all my updates for the past week, and it’s been nice to relax a little bit after the crazy-busy few weeks Ray and I have had. Thanks for reading! 🙂

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