Monthly Archives: March 2013

Week 11-aka Struggletown

Well, I was waiting for a week when things wouldn’t go so well, and here it is. This post is probably going to be not very inspirational as I had a rough week. Sorry guys 🙁

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-This week (and I am extremely ashamed to admit this), I was unable to get to the gym, however it seems that I’ve maintained my current weight loss. I’ve had an incredibly stressful week, with my leg playing up again and requiring me to return to the dermatologist this week. I’ve also been quite anxious this week and had some good old panic attacks, yay. So, because of this, I had to step back and sort out a few things this week to get back on track.

-After lots of thought, I’ve decided to defer my Masters to next session. This session is full of uncertainty for me with several things, and I’m finding that I can’t get into this session’s subject because of it. I’m currently 4-5 weeks behind with no hope of catching up….it would have been ok if everything else was sorted, however it isn’t (sorry if that sounds so vague, but I can’t expand on that atm) So, I’m going to look into deferring this week, so I can start the course when things are more permanent for me. I’ll have an awesome subject to start with for that session, anyway 🙂

-So, my leg. I haven’t told too many people about what my leg actually is (I might even need another post to do this). So, I have Necrobiosis Lipoidica Diabeticorum on my leg (otherwise known as NLD). Basically, in English, I get ulcers on my leg which do not heal up well, and have an unknown cause and cure. All that’s known is that 3% of type 1 diabetics will get it, and more than likely females. So, yeah….a year ago I found out I had this, and together with a team of doctors and dermatologists (who have never really seen this condition-apparently it’s a bit rare in the region!) have been trying to heal up the one on my left leg (which I’ve had since 2010). This is why I’ve been wearing a bandage/covering on my leg for forever. Since Christmas it seemed like my ulcer was finally healed and it was just up to getting the scarring down, however over the past two weeks, it’s become inflamed and possible infected again. To stay this is frustrating and disappointing is an understatement. I’ve been in a bit of pain because of it, so hopefully it’s sorted this week. But yep…I have a trifecta of conditions with unknown causes and cures, yay. Haha.

-I’ve been frustrated this week about the pace of things happening. There’s so many things I’d like to start doing for my future, however I’m just waiting for decisions to be made. It’s been really stressful because I’m stuck in the unknown for a couple of months with plans “on hold”. I’ve just got to keep my head down and do my best for now with what I have 🙂

-I’ve been quite anxious this week, but I should probably explain something. I’ve realised that I’ve been quite sucky as a friend of recent because of this. Of late, I’ve become quite shy and reserved, even with old friends, because I know I’ve changed and have been sucky as I haven’t kept in touch. And even making new friends means I overthink every single thing about what could go wrong sometimes. So, I do apologise for my awkwardness and inability to keep up with socialising or contact recently…it’s probably because I’m trying to get used to balancing health/work/life etc still. I don’t like admitting that I am quite anxious when it comes to making/keeping friends…so anyone out there who’s an old or new friend…I’d love to hear from you if you’re willing to keep in touch and I’ll try to not be so anxious about it all. I may require people to be patient with me though for the above reasons. Anyway, just wanted to mention it.

Sorry that this post has been quite dull and gloomy-I’m ok now, but the last week was quite trying on my nerves. I do have an amazing family, boyfriend and some close friends who have been truly epic over this past week, and I cannot thank them enough for being patient with me and being so supportive. Hopefully there’ll be more positive reports for the following week 🙂

Week 10!

Woo Week 10! That’s pretty much 2 months since I started blogging 🙂

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-This week that has past was shockingly busy. I really pushed myself 9-5 so things this week with the gym and outside stuff hasn’t gone so well. I’ve sort-of just flopped on the couch once I’ve gotten home! But, I feel I proved to myself that I am capable of doing things well, being organised and balancing tasks…so am hoping to keep that in mind over the next few weeks.

-So, I’ve probably lost 250-500gm this week. I think I’ll be booking in for an official weigh-in for next week.

-I really sucked at the gym this week. I’ve been so much extra effort into staying on top of work that I was so worn out this week (plus I got a migraine this week, yay), that I only managed to get to the gym once. I feel really bad about this, because there’s people more busy and tired than me who would have gone. However, when I did go, I weighed myself after my workout (which you’re apparently not supposed to do as you weigh more after a workout), and it appears that I’ve lost 3 kilos since starting there. Yay! I actually felt really good after doing the workout too this week. I’m hoping after a restful weekend, I’ll be in the swing for my three-workouts-a-week.

-My Masters is slowing getting there. It’s really hard because the main textbook (by the lecturer of the subject) is realllllly bland, probably because it’s all about theories. However, the second main textbook is amazing, with clear examples and summaries and keynotes. I plan to buy this book asap. So, I’ve caught up on “reading” my readings, but will be doing summaries of this when I start my long weekend this week (I have Friday off, so it’s going to be a big catch-up day!) 🙂

-I caved, and finally bought Pokemon 2….I decided on White. And so far, I’m impressed. Well, really, there’s not many changes between this game and the old one, but the graphics have slightly improved and I like the progressions between towns. I’m slowly getting through it.

-I’ve also started a new game of Baldur’s Gate as a Kensai, hoping to duel-class to a mage down the track to familiarise myself more with magic. I’ve finished it sooo many times now as a Paladin that it’s about time I play a different class. I guess this is practice to get me used to being a Kensai, as I hope to play one in a Forgotten Realms D&D one day.

-I also want to start playing (and eventually finish) Dragon Age. It’s epic.

-Well, I finally started watching Firefly and I LOVE IT! It reminds me so much of Cowboy Bebop and things and it’s quirky….so a good fit after watching LOST and loving Doctor Who. I will probably be playing a Firefly D&D soon too….is there any of my friends who would be keen to join this?

-I did some D&D this weekend past and feel a little out-of-weather with it. I’m not feeling too confident in gaming atm and am a bit unsure as to how my characters should act. Anyway, hopefully some more games in the future will make me feel a bit better about it.

-I have some sewing projects in mind, however I do not have the space currently to do them. Once I get my own place (hopefully in the next few months or so), I’ll start on these and will keep you guys posted. Some epic friends bought me some Dr Who Tardis fabric for my birthday, so I intend to make an epic dress out of this!

 

And that’s about it for this week. Hopefully I’ll put up some motivational quotes during the week…we’ll see how it goes 🙂 And I owe you guys longer blog entries with more content than just what I’ve done each week. Sorry…it’s just been really busy lately!

Week 9

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Well, Week 9! I’m currently a bit stressed/run-off my feet with work, so this post will be a bit short as there hasn’t been too much happening. Sorry!

-This week, it seems that I’ve lost another 500g, and it appears that I may have very very slightly started to tone up. It’s slow, but it’s getting there.

-I managed to hit the gym three times last week, and I’m aiming to maintain this if I can.

-I’ve started getting into my studies more as it is Week 3 now. It’s made me realise how much of a procrastinator I am with my readings, especially when I’m trying to balance it around the busy working period at the minute. I’ve got an exam in under a month, so I’m trying to do the questions allocated each week and some summary sheets. I’m just behind one week on one book’s readings now, but I still need to answer all the questions from Week 1 and 2. I’m just hoping I can fit this in around work at the minute.

-My boyfriend and I had our first D&D session with my brother and sister-in-law, which was fantastic! It was awesome to have a game with such enthusiastic new players, and I’m so glad to have something like this that we can do with them. I’ve got more D&D this weekend coming and in a few weeks, so it’s giving me a chance to be creative and have fun around work.

-I’m still trying to keep calm as much as I can and not get too panicked with all the busy things happening. It’s good to keep reminding myself that I’m doing the best I can and that is all I can do at this stage. Keeping a level head is tough…but I’m doing ok. A lot of plans for this year are on hold right now until decisions have been made…so I’m just trying to stay on top of things until there’s answers and I know what’s ahead. It’s really, really hard though, but all will be ok.

-Turns out Priceline is discontinuing Physicians Formula. I’m fuming….because as per my previous posts…this has been the only makeup brand that has worked for me after a 4-5 year search. I’ve sent in a complaint email to Priceline, but I doubt that’s going to change anything. I looked on the official Physician’s Formula website, however they do not ship internationally: you have to purchase a US PO Box and have things then forwarded to Australia….so I’m frantically doing ebay searches for the products (and in their lightest shade, translucent)…but if anyone knows of where I can buy their products (and in the translucent shade), it would be much appreciated!

-My boyfriend and I finally finished watching LOST over the weekend. Without giving away any spoilers, I was a combination of happy and sad. Definitely suffered from post-finishing-show-depression for a little bit. I started bawling when Vincent appeared at the end…if you know which part I mean. But, it’s all over! Next up, we have Firefly, Serenity and Game of Thrones to watch.

That’s about it for now….but I’ll hopefully put up some pictures of motivation throughout the week, as I know I’m not the only one who’s pretty stressed and bogged down at the moment.

Week 8

Yes, early post…because there’s so many things I’ve been excited about over the past week. 🙂

WOW. Life is good. I’ve got some great updates this week which aren’t really about me. That’s because this week I’ve been reminded about how amazing life is and to keep positive.

-First big news item: I can officially now say that I’m going to be an aunt! My awesome brother and sis-in-law are expecting their first child, which will be the first grandchild of our family. I am so incredibly excited for them and know that they are going to be absolutely wonderful parents. I’m so excited to being an aunt to a niece or nephew…and they’re going to be very cared for. I volunteer myself as a music/language teacher! And what’s also fantastic is that my best friend and I get to be aunts together, as she is the sister of my sis-in-law. It’s perfect….we will definitely be planning many baby shopping trips. For baby-related-stuff, not babies, haha.

-I felt really motivated and positive this week, feeling like things were under control and able to be done. I just felt calm and enthusiastic about work, studies and keeping happy. I don’t know, maybe it’s because so many things are finally falling into place.

-This week, I wasn’t the best with the gym, only going twice rather than my three times. I managed to injure myself at work, so I had to miss the gym. I should have no excuses though, and have had a few days of some good walks in there. My boyfriend and I went to the Steam Festival this weekend, so plenty of walking and Vitamin D was done (I”m slightly sunburnt, as per tradition of my steam festival visits). But I’m hoping I’ll get into the swing of things again next week.

-My weight is about the same as last week. I haven’t put any weight on though. I guess I’m frustrated that it’s pretty much 500gm-1 kilo max a week I’m losing, so I get a little de-motivated about progress. So many sites for diets and special weight loss regimes claim that you can lose kilos a week…so while I know this is the best way for me to do it with my diabetes and for the long run, it’s a bit disappointing that I’m not seeing results as quickly as I would think. People have been commenting that it seems that I”m losing weight…but I’m not seeing it on the scales and my “fat jeans” are still tight-as on me. Hopefully I’ll see something change soon.

-I’ve suffered some anxious bursts over the past few weeks, however I’ve had my boyfriend by my side supporting me. I am so incredibly lucky to have someone that loves me for who I am (including being my anxious self sometimes and a bit of a lame doofus) and does not expect me to change anything so that they will love me. He wants me to be happy with myself, and if that includes being more healthy and losing weight, so be it. He’s actually trying to get healthy too, so once our work is more permanent we’re hoping to really start going to the gym and supporting each other more. It’s because of his support that I’ve started monitoring my diabetes correctly and that I’m sorting everything I’ve been wanting to look at for ages. I don’t like being all mushy but…I can see myself being with him for a long, long, long time. Hopefully forever. I love him to bits and am so thankful for his ongoing support.

-I’m still off soft drink (bar one when I’ve gone out to events, which has either been Lemon Lime Bitters or a Creaming Soda as a special treat). The fact that I’m still off Coke Zero and Pepsi Max is incredible to me. And I’m drinking my daily intake of water like a boss.

-I’ve started another savings account in planning for the future. So, now I have two savings accounts. One is in my parent’s accounts (so that I can’t access it at all) and when I pay my rent/bills etc, included in this amount is money to go into this account. However, I’ve also made my own additional e-saver account for future plans…and this is a big step for me. I now feel confident budgeting my money and keeping such an account, and it’s going very well. I feel prepared for anything that’s ahead now.

So yeah, that’s about it! Life is wonderful and I’ve received many reminders of that this week, particularly through the people dear to me.521378_344056039032816_754425161_n